When I was Evil

Once, when I was evil,

I said evil things and laughed as I said the evil

I found the evil both humorous and empowering

to laugh at the weak and differing

I was evil and now I weep

it is not as if I was unaware of the power of words

worse than sticks, worse than stones

those wounds heal

but not the wounds of words

I was evil and now I weep

Once, when I was evil,

I saw evil things and laughed as I watched the evil

I found the evil both seductive and entertaining

to laugh at the weak and differing

I was evil and now I weep

it is not as if I was unaware of the power of images

worse than slings, worse than arrows

those wounds heal

but not the wounds of images

I was evil and now I weep

Once, when I was evil,

I heard evil things and laughed as I heard the evil

I found the evil both reasonable and equitable

to laugh at the weak and differing

I was evil and now I weep

it is not as if I was unaware of the power of sound

worse than bullets, worse than bombs

those wounds heal

but not the wounds of sounds

I was evil and now I weep

Once, when I was evil,

I did evil things and laughed as I did the evil

I found the evil both divisive and exciting

to laugh at the weak and differing

I was evil and now I weep

it is not as if I was unaware of the power of actions

worse than knives, worse than swords

those wounds heal

but not the wounds of actions

I was evil and now I weep

Once, when I was evil,

I condoned evil things and laughed as I condoned the evil

I found the evil both attractive and effusive

to laugh at the weak and differing

I was evil and now I weep

it is not as if I was unaware of the power of condoning

worse than acid, worse than salt

those wounds heal

but not the wounds of condonation

I was evil and now I weep

Once, though I was evil,

I rejected evil things and cried as I rejected the evil

I found the evil both debilitating and elusive

to have laughed at the weak and differing

I was evil and now I weep

it is not as if I am unaware of the power of evil

worse than lies, worse than deceit 

those wound still open

as are the wounds of the past

I am still evil and still I weep

jeg. 7/15